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Love and Permanent Companionship

 

If you are looking for someone for romance, Costa Rica might just be the right place for you.

Ladies will find gentleman admirers if they so desire. Due to machismo, Costa Rican men are more flirtatious and aggressive than North American men. Most Costa Rican men think foreign women have looser morals and are easier conquests than ticas (Costa Rican women). Be careful to take time to develop a long-term, meaningful relationship and do not rush things.

As one local expat pointed out, Tico men have the best labia in the world. Labia when used in slang, means rap.'Costa Rican men are charming, witty, and know how to treat a woman. They can seduce almost any woman, regardless of nationality. I have a few tico friends that could get a woman into their car and to a mirador overlooking the city within five minutes of meeting them.

Usually, however, these relationships, if you can call them that, don't last too long. The conquest is a big part of the tico male's psyche, and then it's off to the next one. Don't be fooled by these modern-day Casanovas, that is of course, unless you want to.

Many single middle-aged women have a tough time finding a mate because they cannot compete with the young curvaceous ticas. As one expat woman put it, ”We just happen to live in a country of trafficstopping gorgeous women,  all of whom seem to have been raised in the Geisha School of Relating to Men. If you are planning to move here based on some dream of meeting a Ricky Martin or other Latin stud, think again.

Furthermore, if you do meet a Latin man, he may have a hard time handling an independent American woman. Latin men also like to have a lot of girlfriends on the side. As we mention in Chapter 1 many Latin men measure their virility by the number of women they can seduce.

Men of any age will have no problem meeting Costa Rican women. The women in Costa Rica seem to like older, more experienced men. It is not unusual to see a wife who is 10 to 20 years younger than her spouse. This practice may be frowned on in some countries but is accepted in Costa Rica. Many retirees we know claim to feel rejuvenated and to have a new lease on life after becoming involved with younger women. Costa Rican women have an unparalleled reputation as being the most beautiful, flirtatious and accessible women in Latin America, including Brazil. The ladies of Costa Rica are more warm-hearted and devoted than their North American counterparts. They consider you a joy. One retiree we know boasts, The women here really know how to treat you like a king!

A man doesn't even have to be rich to meet women; a $1,500 to $2,000 Social Security check translates to a millionaire's pay in Costa Rica.

Here is what one expat's Costa Rican wife said about her relationship in a recent edition of The Tico Times. Most of the time when a young woman marries an older man, people think she's doing it for the money. I like older men. They are experienced; they've had a lot of fun in the past, so they start to think, I want to stay now with someone for the rest of my life.'Plus they have their life set up, so they have time to spend with their woman.

With Costa Rican men close to her age, she says, their behavior changes after marriage. With Costa Rican men, you are a princess, but when you get married the whole thing changes: You are going to have my children. I'm working, so you should make my dinner, wash my clothes.The women get submissive and the men get possessive.

Costa Rican men don't see their women in the home being the porn star they watch on TV. Ticos think the woman at home is pretty, sweet and the mother of their children.

No wonder Costa Rican women are highly sought by foreign men. However, before becoming involved with a Costa Rican woman, you should realize many cultural differences can lead to all kinds of problems, especially if you do not speak Spanish fluently. I have seen so many disasters with people who try to create a relationship without a common language. If a Costa Rican woman is in your future, you are going to have to be able to communicate with her. Even if she speaks some English, the nitty-gritty type of communication that a real relationship requires will definitely require some effort on your part. Men need to seriously consider studying Spanish if they want to have a successful relationship with a native Spanish speaker.

Generally, Latin women are more jealous and possessive than American women, and tend not to understand our ways unless they have lived in North America. Also, be aware that because of their comparative wealth, most Americans, especially the elderly, are considered prime targets for some unscrupulous Latin females.

As we alluded to at the end of the first chapter, in some cases there is another bad side of marrying a Costa Rican woman. You can end up supporting her whole family, either directly or indirectly, as many foreigners complain. There is an out-of-print book, Happy Aging With Costa Rican Women  The Other Costa Rica, by James Y. Kennedy. It tells all about the trials and tribulations and experiences many gringos have with Costa Rican women. You may be able to find a used copy in a second-hand bookstore in San José or borrow it from a local expatriate.

We advise you to give any relationship time and make sure a woman is sincerely interested in you and not just your money. You will save yourself a lot of grief and heartaches in the long run. Since prostitution is legal and available to men of all ages, be careful of the ladies of ill repute. Many foreigners, after inviting one of these females to spend the night, wake up the next day without the woman and minus wallets and other valuables.

One scam we recently heard of involves a well-dressed woman with a brief case who approaches strangers. She claims to be from another Latin American country and wanting to celebrate her birthday. She says she is alone and has nobody to celebrate it with her. She then invites the unsuspecting victim to accompany her to a bar for a drink. Once in the bar, she slips a drug into the glass of the foreigner. Within minutes he is unconscious. The woman then relieves him of his cash and credit cards. She then takes the credit cards to an accomplice who quickly charges large amounts of money to the cards. So, never drink from a glass or bottle that has been out of your sight.

Most single men can avoid getting involved with gold diggers, prostitutes or other troublesome women if they know where to look for good women. The personals section of the The Tico Times is an excellent place to advertise for companionship. It is relatively inexpensive and many Costa Rican women read this section each week. Check out the current or past issues of the The Tico Times for ideas on how to write one of these ads.

One American we know ran an ad in the The Tico Times and the local Spanish newspapers and ended up screening hundreds of women before finding his ideal mate. As far as we know he is still happily married. Taking classes at the university is another way to meet quality women. The University of Costa Rica in San Pedro is full of beautiful, well-educated females. Cafés, restaurants, bars and other places around the university are good places to meet women. If you have Costa Rican friends, they will usually be able introduce you to someone worthwhile.

The best places for anyone to meet nice women who are sincere and honest tend to be where they would be almost anywhere. Go to church or get involved in a community service project. Most people meet their friends and mates at work. So work at something, even if as a volunteer. If you have Costa Rican friends, they will usually be able introduce you to someone worthwhile.

Meeting people in bars, nightclubs, at the beach, etc., is generally a lousy way to meet someone you really want to have a relationship with anywhere in the world.

Probably the most effective way to meet quality Costa Rica women is through an introduction service. Spanish Eyes Introductions provides such a service and screens their women very carefully to protect their clients. In addition to their standard services, they offer parties for their members to meet women. We have several friends who are members and rave about this service. You may contact them at: Tel: 289-5271 or 228-7389, E-mail: info@spanisheyesccostarica. com or see http://www.spanisheyescostarica.com.

The key is to find a nice, traditional Costa Rican woman and avoid getting involved with bad Costa Rican women. Costa Rica has plenty of working girls and hustlers. They hang out at the popular bars and discos specifically to pick up guys. They also go shopping in the malls, ride buses and go to grocery stores. So just because you have met a nice girl in a typical working-girl hang-out does not mean you have met a quality person. If you know what to look for, they are easy to spot.

Many men have knowingly and unknowingly married bad women. Some girls are honest and will directly ask you for money. The hustlers are more dangerous because their agenda is to really take you to the cleaners, and they do not rule out marrying you to achieve this objective. Some men say they have lost everything from airline tickets that are cashed instead of used, to large sums of money the girls claim they need to get visas, houses and more. These are the women who contribute to the bad stories you may hear about some Costa Rican women. Unfortunately, the hustlers are the easiest girls to meet in many instances and a good number of men fall into this trap.

A very small number of these women will become good wives, find religion, etc. They are often women who have been sexually or otherwise abused at a very young age, so the problem is very deeply rooted. Your realistic chances of converting them are very slim. No matter how gorgeous the girl is, it is just not worth it.

The best way to spot a bad girl is her profile. They never have a job, never live with their parents, never have phone numbers and never invite you to their home or introduce you to their friends or family. They do not want to leave any trail for you to track them down later. They typically come from very poor backgrounds and have very little education, rarely completing high school.

They are quite aggressive and target older Americans. Often they speak a little English and will start up a conversation with you or smile at you until you make the first move. They will appear friendly and sincerely interested in you. They are always attractive or very young. They will always ask for your phone number.

Perhaps the best way to politely get rid of one of these women is to ask them to loan you a little money. You will immediately see their interest disappear. Actually, a nice woman in Costa Rica might just loan you the money.

Women you see working in stores are usually poorly educated and from poor families. Some may show an interest in an older American who is friendly with them, but the relationship is likely to be overly influenced by a poor woman looking for a rich American husband.

Foreign men should beware of the so-called Costa Rican setup.We have heard countless stories where Costa Rican women get pregnant as a ploy to get a foreigner to marry them. We believe it is our duty to alert men about this underhanded and self-centered method of ensnaring them into an unwanted relationship.

In general, a nice Costa Rica woman typically lives with her parents until she gets married. Single daughters are not encouraged to get jobs unless the parents are very poor. Instead, they are expected to help with taking care of the house or study.

Quality Costa Rican women from traditional family backgrounds are raised to take care of their man. They can be quite possessive and jealous at times, but this is only because they are very emotional and deeply in love with their man. They tend to seek out long-term relationships, starting at a very young age. It is quite rare for Costa Rican women to have any interest in casually dating many different men.

Costa Rica's Beautiful Women
Costa Rica's Beautiful Women

When approached by strangers, they are friendly and helpful by nature; this is their culture. All Costa Ricans value making new friends. Americans often misread this friendliness and think the woman has a romantic interest in them. In order for the woman to develop any romantic interest in you at all, she has to first know from a trusted third party that you are looking for a long-term relationship. After a brief encounter, a decent woman will never ask for your phone number. If you ask for her number, she will always give you the wrong number in order to avoid appearing rude. Nice women live with their parents and would never want to have strange men calling their house. From a romantic interest point of view, quality Latin women are very difficult to meet.

As we alluded to earlier, some Costa Rican women prefer older men. Most Costa Rican women meet a boy in high school and are only interested in men their own age. However, about 40 percent do seriously prefer older men. We have met many Costa Rican friends who are happily married to women 10 to 25 years younger than them.

If the woman is convinced you are seriously looking for a longterm relationship, she will then start to show an interest in getting to know you better. Her initial physical attraction to you will usually be of very minor importance to her. Her main interest will be focused on your personality: Are you are a kind person? Can you offer minimum security to raise a family? Do you sincerely care about her family? Would you make a good father?

Over the years we have encountered a lot of foreigners who end up not using common sense and get involved with people with whom they would probably never associate back home. This brings us to the story of Dumb and Dumber.

Dumb came to Costa Rica about 12 years ago from the United States, where he was a successful businessman. Almost upon arriving here, he became romantically involved with a woman of ill- repute. He was basically too lazy and busy getting drunk to find a quality mate. Over the course of his relationship, he lost about $300,000 because he entrusted his business dealings to his girlfriend. After splitting up with her and having to give her half of everything he owned because of their common-law situation, he goes and gets involved with another women who will probably take him to the cleaners someday.

Dumber is even more stupid than Dumb. He came to the country as a millionaire. The first thing he did was get romantically involved with a woman of the night. Dumber also spent most of his time in bars, like Dumb. Consequently, when he broke up with his lady friend, after a few years together, he had to pay her about $50,000. He is now with another woman and most likely supporting her whole family. He will probably end up broke like Dumb. Neither Dumb nor Dumber speak Spanish nor have made any effort to understand the locals and constantly refer to them in derogatory terms.

The majority of foreign men who come to Costa Rica don't share Dumb and Dumber's fate. Nevertheless, they should learn a lesson from this story.


From "The New Golden Door to retirement and Living in Costa Rica" by Christopher Howard.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. No part of this article may be reproduced without written permission of the authors and copyright owner.
 

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